I like to pretend I'm perfect.
My house is always tidy and organized.
I make delicious, healthy meals every day.
My kids are well-behaved and know how to clean up after themselves.
My yard is weed-free and perfectly manicured.
My hair is always neatly done and my make-up applied perfectly.
Every plant I own is healthy and grows green.
Sadly though, these statements are so far from the truth.
The real me has a messy house with piles of clutter in every room.
I try to make healthy, delicious meals, but most days I'm lucky if I can just cut up some fruit and throw some chicken nuggets into the oven.
My kids leave a constant trail of mess behind them as they tear through the house.
My yard is probably one of the weediest on the street (seriously, I can only pull about 3 weeds before the kids start rolling in the dirt and fighting with one another!).
My hair hasn't been cut or colored in a whole year and it's usually wadded up in a mess on top of my head.
And I can't seem to keep a plant alive to save my life. I'm responsible for three toddlers, two dogs, and a husband. One more thing to keep alive and healthy is just too much for me :)
So that brings me to the topic of this post...
my black thumb.
I definitely do not have a green thumb when it comes to plant life.
I am so horrible at maintaining plants, that I would say that my thumb is the opposite of green.
It's black.
Is that the opposite of green??
I bought a huge palm tree on clearance at Lowe's for $5 a few months ago.
I was so pumped at the deal I got.
Turns out $5 isn't such a good deal if you can't keep the plant alive.
I can't figure out what happened.
I mean, I watered it once a week.
Okay, maybe it was only once every couple of weeks.
I guess that could have been the reason.
Even my outside plants look pretty sad.
Here is a pot that sits on my front porch.
It used to have beautiful white, purple, and yellow flowers (Don't ask me what kind they were. I know nothing about plant names).
I have been able, however, to keep my spider plant alive inside the house.
I won it in a drawing at a M.O.P.S. meeting and I think it's kinda ugly.
So of course, it is the only one that actually looks healthy.
Go figure.
I've also had decent luck with this little fern.
I almost killed it once, but somehow managed to bring it back to life.
Therefore you can still see lingering brown parts...
I recently read this in a Cottages and Bungalows magazine:
One houseplant per 100 square feet.
Are you kidding me!?
I would need to own 35 houseplants.
And keep them clean and free of dust.
So NOT happening.
Clearly, aside from being decorative, houseplants provide great health benefits.
I can't figure out what happened.
I mean, I watered it once a week.
Okay, maybe it was only once every couple of weeks.
I guess that could have been the reason.
Even my outside plants look pretty sad.
Here is a pot that sits on my front porch.
It used to have beautiful white, purple, and yellow flowers (Don't ask me what kind they were. I know nothing about plant names).
After I cleaned out all of the dead stuff, I was left with a pretty sad looking green mess.
Hey, at least it's still green!
This one doesn't look that great either.
And I DO water it! It even gets rain water.
I have been able, however, to keep my spider plant alive inside the house.
I won it in a drawing at a M.O.P.S. meeting and I think it's kinda ugly.
So of course, it is the only one that actually looks healthy.
Go figure.
I've also had decent luck with this little fern.
I almost killed it once, but somehow managed to bring it back to life.
Therefore you can still see lingering brown parts...
I recently read this in a Cottages and Bungalows magazine:
One houseplant per 100 square feet.
Are you kidding me!?
I would need to own 35 houseplants.
And keep them clean and free of dust.
So NOT happening.
Clearly, aside from being decorative, houseplants provide great health benefits.
But how do you keep them alive???